Wow, what a whirlwind of activity. The wedding went off wonderfully, but I will say I think both J and are I kind of glad it’s over. It was truly a pleasure to see everyone gathered together and to say our vows to each other with that kind of support and love around us, but it was also stressful at the last minutes pulling the last details together, couple with moving two weeks earlier and a sick kitty to really throw us off. We did a small wedding, 46 people total, and didn’t do so very many of the “traditional” things that seem to be dictated by the wedding industry, and not really by tradition. We had our ceremony in a local park, where we didn’t even need a permit, yay! We did our dinner at our favorite restaurant, which was where we had our first date, but is also a Bay Area Top 100 restaurant, so the food was excellent. We had no DJ/band/dancing, and I don’t think a single person minded, although I’m sure a few were surprised. We had originally thought we might have attendants, but when I asked my sister if she wanted to wear a bridesmaid dress, she pretty much said “no” (duh!) and that was that. Because we did a restaurant, we didn’t have to do decorations, or a caterer, or flowers or colors, for that matter. All this meant that the giant “To-Do” list on theknot.com became much much smaller and more manageable. And it meant that we didn’t break the bank, as we had the unexpected expense of kitty-cat being in the hospital for 3 nights and all the stuff that goes along with buying a new house and appliances.
The day itself was so wonderful. A lot of brides I’ve talked to say it was a big blur and they didn’t get to enjoy themselves or even eat the food they paid so much for. It really didn’t feel that way to me at all. We woke up fairly early (yes, we spent the night in the same room) and did normal morning things. At some point, J ran off for a couple last minute errands (like getting his car detailed so we could ride in class!) I was literally just surfing the web waiting for the hairdresser to show up at 11 am. That was the time I got the most nervous, with nothing specific to do, just time to fret. She showed up and so did J’s brother to take some pre-wedding photos (again, we didn’t hire a professional, their cost is OUTrageous.) My hair and makeup took ‘til just after 1 pm; meanwhile my sister, brother-in-law, and mom showed up and fed me a PB&J sandwich, perfect! J was getting ready downstairs meanwhile. Then my sister got me dressed (you see, she really was my maid-of-honor, just without the silly dress) and we were pretty much on-time to head out to the park for the 2 pm early gathering time for photos.
Oh, the park. The day turned out gorgeous, and our view was completely unobstructed, but at the price of some significant wind! And chill! We really couldn’t complain much though, since they had been calling for rain showers earlier in the week. People were already arriving when we got there and we chatted with them and took some photos and then it was time! Our friend E officiated for us, and she was so totally the right choice. We wrote our own vows and she wrote a ceremony to outline them, and it all had a wonderful sentiment and feel. J and I both flubbed our lines a little, but at least we both did, and there’s no video evidence, so I can say we did them perfectly, although the photos of me giggling might give us away. Maybe we were a bit nervous after all. I have to say though, that almost every single photo of us from that day has us smiling and looking pretty relaxed.
The ceremony itself was pretty quick and then some more photos. The one regret I have is that it seems like we didn’t get enough photos of just me and J, partly b/c we didn’t have a professional forcing us to do such shots, but also partially b/c it was so damn windy and cold that we cleared out pretty quickly after the ceremony. We had everyone sign our Quaker-style certificate that J designed and drew up. I really have to say, he offered to do the certificate early on when I had started to contact calligraphers, and I am so glad he ended doing it: it turned out GORFGEOUS, and it was all done by him so it has even more meaning.
After the signing, there was some time before dinner. J and I were hoping to show up at the restaurant and set up namecards and things but we couldn’t get in there ‘til later. That actually turned out just fine. We sat in J’s car near the restaurant, just enjoying our first few minutes together as a married couple, going over the day, the ceremony, everything.
When we got in to the restaurant, it was a bit of chaos trying to figure out the seating. We literally did not know how the tables were going to be set up until we walked in there. I had made up some preliminary outlines based on what we were told originally, but the numbers didn’t add up right. After some scrambling, I think it all worked out ok. I had struggled the day before the wedding with how to seat all the family and it ended up that the best solution was to put all the people of our parents’ generation (parents, aunts, uncles) at one table, with us and our best friends and siblings at another. I think that worked out pretty well. The rest was a mishmash as these things always tend to be.
Part II later...
